Das year in review...

Welcome, folks, to the year end review from pre war condition.

On the left we have Elsie giving the classic fowler gaze. i am going to start with her, as she has been the biggest thing that EVER happened to me besides meeting Terri.

Elsie,
you have given me so much and have taught me more in three and a half months, than i have learned in as many years. i will protect you, guide you, teach you, nourish you, engage you and make sure you understand as much as possible about life, in the best way that i can. you mean so much to me-yourself and terri that is-and i want to make sure that you know this each and every day. i thought i knew everything about life until i helped create you and you deserve the best that i can give to you. i hope that i can show this to you some day to let you see what i have written, because it comes from my heart and my being.

i will love you endlessly...

wha? that's not the usual cynical sarcasm that we are used to? what gives?

sorry, things have been too good to wallow in the mire.

i have enjoyed a year of constant progress, both internally and externally. i have found new things to distract my self with as well as finding new ways to challenge my self to be better.

1) 'How To Be Free' by joe blow. don't let the author's name fool you. i downloaded this as a free book through the app store for the iphones. it's sort of a self help book, but not in a cheesy way. 'joe' guides you in a very easy way through how to let all of the things that hold you back GO AWAY. he leaves a lot of room for one to ponder but never forces his ideas on you. it's as though you are having a conversation with a stranger on a bus and you have an epiphany. if you can find it, i suggest you read the story. It opened me up and let me let go of a lot of baggage.

2) family. there is no doubt in my mind that i love my family. it has been an ever expanding, contracting and morphing entity that i have enjoyed, hated, endeared and was confused by. the thing is, the love has always been there. because of my family i have the thick skin that i have today. BUT because of my family, i am also losing pieces of my armor and am able to let them see me for who i am. each and everyone i am related to has had some impact on me in one way or another, and i'm grateful to be part of every one of you.

3) gadgets. the laptop, the iphone. the flat screen t.v. i don't mean to follow a meaningful paragraph with THINGS, but it's these things that help as the glue to keep my family together for me. i am entertained, enjoyed and constantly in awe of what technology has given me over the past year. and to think, thirty years ago these things were a thought in someone's head.

I hope that some day i can give back to technology. for now, i will continue blogging in my lonely corner of the interwebs.

4) friends. this is an expansion of family, but i had to give my friends some mention. you are all my family, when i am not with my family. you take me for who i am more than anyone else and i appreciate that. most of the people i am around with now, have been in my radar going on twenty years. we have had epic adventures, lots and lots of good times and many battles too. you don't find a good friend, they find you. that is why we are all gathering tomorrow to ring in the new year and i cannot wait.!

You know, technology aside...things are pretty damn good. i never in a million years would have thought that i'd be in the place that i am in, in this world. you are reading this and i can't express it enough how important family and friends are and have been.

so that's the year in review?

i'll check in with you later.

from january 7th until the 12th, i will be on vacation in new york city whilst terri goes to buying conventions for her job. free hotel room on 7th street! i'll be taking care of elsie all day, terri and i will be going out for dinner. i hope that the used copy of half life 2 for the pc comes in before we leave...

happy new year everyone!

some favorite favorites.

i don't have really much going on today, i'm on elsie duty and don't want to go out. this is due to the fact that when i stop my car, the brakes make the worst grinding noise ever. i have an appointment monday to get it checked out.

this could mean only one thing:

CAR RENTAL!

i love renting cars. they are usually things that are beyond my financial reach or are so odd that they bewilder. my last two were a stark contrast for sure. i want to get a compact or sedan next. i need to get elsie back and forth 18 miles out of my way every day now, so the big truck is definitely out.

the best part? it's only $15 a day. this is due to my mechanic. he has a great deal with the only car rental company in town.

so that is one of my favorite things...

...here are a bunch more:

yukon gold potatoes

making homemade chili

smelling a freshly opened bag of chips

rice and bean burritos

easily killing a boss in a video game

finding a record on the cheap that reminds me of my youth

getting the right ratio of sugar and milk in my coffee

swedish fish

monterey jack cheese

cheesy 80's horror movies

all green lights on king street

terri agrees to let me loll around on sunday because i worked 6 days prior

christmas gifts

getting a fire started on the first try (kerosene usually solves the problem)

the smell of the inside of our shed

iced tea mixed with lemonade

a good stout

head shots in a first person shooter

a good salami on rye with some mustard

tropical fruit cocktail

chai

seeing a storm roll in

finding a satellite in the night sky/seeing a planet

driving home from work at the start of a three day weekend

arriving at a party

caramel and chocolate

no lines at a store

orchard beach-off season

the cabin in goshen

paddling a canoe/boat

writing a song

reddit.com

rage comics

hanging out in the back yard with friends

abandoned buildings/places

cheeseburgers

afternoon naps

i am out of ideas and elsie is hungry...thanks for letting me share.

A few more things (& more things.)

Hello, to the left we have an image from http://derp.memebase.com/. a rather insane site that looks into being caught at the wrong moment and in general, other funny stuff.

i was unfortunate to find the website http://www.reddit.com/, which suggests that it is the 'front page of the internet.' i can spend hours looking at things that anyone and everyone in the www can find. you have to be aware though, that a bit of the content is geared for college students.

and then there is http://cleverbot.com/. um, ask it anything....you will be surprised by the answers.

these have both been great distractions, and i wanted to share them with you. both have adult content...so..be an adult and not a baby about the content.

the other thing i recently watched was found here: https://buy.louisck.net/. he is offering a streaming/downloadable copy of his special for a flat rate of $5. you get to watch it streaming twice and download it twice. FOR $5!

if you haven't heard of Louis C.K., he is one of the funniest comedians out there and has his own show called 'Louie' on the FX network. this guy goes to places with his routine that would make gilbert godfried and bob sagat wince.

i keep looking at the picturrrr above and cracking up. that is the internal face that i make when i make a mistake.

for instance: a co worker said that a record he ordered from japan finally came in.

i asked if it was an import.

the words were sliding out of my mouth and i pictured my brain having hands and trying to grab at the words and then giving up.

it happens to all of us. you try to carefully construct a reply or rebuttal, you have matured to the point that you can immediately pull any file to the front of your mind in a nano second, you wind up the response and...nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

the best part is that when it happens, everyone will usually get a laugh out of it. some mistakes have gotten mileage in my work circle.

so everyone wins. unless it ends up on the derp or the reddits.

O.K., christmas...the holidays...happy holidays?! what? this is the time of the year for good cheer. we want everyone to feel the warmth of the season no matter who you pray or don't pray to.

the 'happy holidays' greeting is an all inclusive greeting. it doesn't take away from 'merry christmas in any way. you don't hate christ if you don't say merry christmas. on december 25th, i switch my happy holidays greeting with merry christmas....because that's the day you say that. i have said 'happy veteran's day' to a vet on verterans day, i called my mom on mother's day to say 'happy mother's day....'so, by default, i say merry christmas on christmas. AND I AM AN ATHIEST!
i love christmas! all the good food and cheer and everyone is getting along for once. it's great!

let's try to put our stupid personal ideals aside and take the good cheer for what it is, as this is the most wonderful time of the year.

christians aren't in any more danger of being persecuted that any other religion in this country...except for muslims?

check out this 'moral compass:'

http://floridafamily.org/

Eh?

mysteries of the cosmos and beyond!

We're all going to die:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/mysterious-planet-sized-object-spotted-near-mercury-154443870.html

I read that the explanation of this is that it's a mirror effect of mercury after it was hit by a solar flare...others are more colorful with their ideas.

i have a friend that insists that we never went to the moon. his theory (which i have to listen to, because it's a THEORY) is that were were lagging so far behind the russian space program, that we made up the whole thing to be there first. he also said that we couldn't possibly have the brain power to get onto the moon, let alone space.

my rebuttal was that if we went to any observatory with a really good telescope, we'd be able to see the stuff we left behind on the moon.

again, he was stating a theory. as ludicrous as i thought it was, it's not hard fact and we debated physics a little bit before our brains started to hurt.

my brother and i-wait, my brother- was a huge fan of the early space programs. he would spend hours drawing rocket designs and we even had some model rockets to shoot off. my dad had one when i was really little and i remember sitting in his truck with my mom as he and my brother were shooting one of the small rockets off at a school parking lot in wilbraham oh so many years ago. space exploration is the most amazing thing besides just being alive. i love to hear of new discoveries and to see what we found day after day. any skeptic or theorist misses out on the earth being a great place to sit and fly through the universe.

check out this site to get the newest pics and info of space:

http://apod.nasa.gov

Or check out this recent article:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/compost/post/new-habitable-planet-the-view-from-kepler-22b/2011/12/06/gIQA3ah9ZO_blog.html

maybe if we can reach these places and they aren't inhabited, we'd be able to do it right....maybe that's why we came here in the first place?

Just a theory.....

Gizmo saves man's life...or lets him find it again.

From my last bloggers, you found out that I got an iPhones. I am weary of the new technologies, but this thing has literally changed my life.

How, may you ask?

Here's how:

1) the ability to utilize an assortment of functions to gain knowledge and understanding.

I now have the ability to almost instantly discover, correct, edit and relearn anything at the touch of a finger.

Through applications, I have gazed at the stars, learning conversational Italian, and am learning how to cope with depression. All of this is for free-or the price I pay for this. I have uploaded books by Poe, Vonnegut, and others. I have discovered and spurned the reddits, and succumbed to the memes. I can see Elsie growing even when I am at work and can share her growth with those I love. I can' T say that I wasn't t sceptical of this iPhones, I can say that all of the flashiness and hype was a bit of a turn off, but I have to say that this is one of the better things I' be ever agreed to participate in. It really changed my life in msny ways. I am typing this with said phone. I could be in a park, in a hot air balloon, or on a bear rug in front of a fire, but I am here and wanted to contribute this to my blog, my Corner of the interweaves.

Thank you mr iPhones, rest easy.

Apps burger syndrome.

I am trying out my mobile phone link to the blog.

I am wondering when or if there is an attachable keyboard for the iPhone.

We didn't do much yesterday. We had some pizza and onion rings and watched the movie 'the tree of life.' what an interesting and visually arresting film. Before that we went for a walk around the neighborhood. It was really nice out and was good to get some exercise in. I also spent the night combing the books app for the iPhones and found a ton of stuff. I'm sure that some of the books are abridged, but I did find a few good ones.

I don't know what's up for today, but I thought that I'd write in to see how this thing worked.

It's pretty cool, actually.

Turkey with a side of influenza.

great picture right? it's the influenza virus, more commonly known as the flu. i don't know where i caught this nastiness, but it is running rampant through my body as i type.

it started on sunday in the evening. terri and i dined on some take away and i suddenly felt really tired. i fell asleep for two hours and had vivid dreams. when i awoke, i was delirious and thirsty.

the evenings sleep was fraught with massive amounts of sweating and chills. i awoke on monday and knew i was sick, but soldiered on to work.

i spent last night at home, drinking kefir and mineral water. i developed a rasp in my lungs that is really loud when i breathe and i have been coughing a bit.

today i had really bad diarrhea and almost got sick a few times. but i managedto go to work and haul my pale face into my duties. it's all about the money and i don't have nay sick tome to use.

as i write this, my face feels as though it may melt off and my stomach sounds like a broken tuba.

i know it wasn't something i'd eaten, and i know it isn't from over work or stress. it's just the common flu, and it found it's way into my home sooner than i would've liked.

as you are probably doing this next few days, i am also going to travel to see family and friends. i hope they understand my trepidation in not getting too close or even making contact. i haven't even been able to hold or kiss elsie since sunday in fear of infection. i just wait until the next time the flu acts up and wants to exit my body.

one funny thing: my appetite is still in good shape. i have kept it pretty light, but at the same time i am still eating as i usually do.

i just want this to go away so i can feel some sense of normality before the holiday onslaught rushes over me with it's foul tide.

a few other things:

black friday- you are not what you own. stop being a consumer whore and remember what this time of year is really for: friends and family.

phone: i purchased an iphone 3G S, mostly for photos and updates from elsie. if you don't have my number, email me. i'm sure my address is somewhere on my profile.

music: godflesh, scorn, faith no more, infest, new hoax ep, psudoku.

photo: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flu

i go feel bad now.

A big day for Elsie.

this picture on the left was taken when terri was hanging out with her our friend kristen. it pretty much sums up how elsie has been developing over the past two months. i said before that she went through a growth spurt, but as time goes on, she has been suprizing terri and i more and more with her abilities.

first of all, she is at the level of a four month old, even though this is her two month period. terri has been working diligently every day while i am at work, to help her associate more. i have a little jealousy in me about this, as i return home and don't get the same, but i'm sure if the roles were reversed, it would be the same.

i am so happy that i have a healthy and calm child. i have heard horror stories about colic, allergies, problems with breastfeeding and general malaise that i am subconsciously knocking on wood that we have been so lucky.

the first time we gave elsie a bath, she was calm. the first time i was honored to bottle feed her, she was calm. when the cat scratched her face, she cried twice and went back to feeding. we are dealing with one tough cookie here. again, i feel so happy at elsie's fortitude.

except for today.

elsie showed us just how brave she was and how strong we are to protect her.

today she had her two month round of shots. yes, shots.

there were three in all. right in the thighs.

i am not going to get into the schematics of what she was given, but it looked better on paper more than when the needle came out.

to back up a little, i feel that these things are a necessary evil. a few moments of discomfort are worth the pain to avoid what could be a lifetime of trouble. i, personally, will be getting a flu shot for the next eighteen years just for the privilege of having elsie in my life, which is well worth it in my arena.

anyway, i kept reminding terri of that fact, and she told me she was going to cry. i knew i had the fortitude to use reason and science, but when the first needle came out i said 'OH GOD!' and my eyes started to well up. the first needle went in as we were cooing and helping her and she cried like i have never heard. she was so helpless but had to take it, her tiny world was turned upside down. who would do this to her? why in hell would those who loved her so much, give her so much pain? i was two breaths short of jacking the nurse against the wall and telling her, 'if you harm my daughter again, i'll stick you in the eye with this needle.' BUT the eleven o'clock news has been aired and you would've heard of it by now.

instead, i shared the pain that elsie felt with terri and we both cried together. it was a moment i haven't felt since the operating room where the c-section happened.

it may seem weird that terri and i were reunited through this, but i'm going to let this one slide and not put too much into it.

and to let you know, elsie cried for about a minute and a half and was suckling quietly. i sent a message to terri asking how 'my girls' were and the picture she sent me-not an hour past the needles- was of elsie smiling.

that made my day in spades and i just had to share the experience with you, dear reader.

right now, terri and elsie are in the bedroom sleeping as i continue my battle against insomnia.

and if i stated anything earlier about not having enough time with my daughter: there are plenty of adventures we will both go on and plenty of times we will be in awe of each other, so i'll dig deep and try to be patient. that's one thing that elsie taught me today for being so brave that she has become my hero.

...

not much to write about today...EXCEPT THIS:

Shatner frying a turkey in doors...i wish i was at THAT party!

A horrible way to blogger.

i have been reviewing past posts, and my writing is a bit thin. i end up spewing out the point i try to make on the subject i picked, and the rest is just filler.

i can barely breathe right now due to a hot sauce misjudgment.

i made a huge cheese quesedilla and quartered the damn thing. on each quarter i splashed a different hot sauce, going from mild to REALLY FUCKING HOT.

here's the breakdown:

Q1: sylvia's xxxtra hot sauce.

Q2: tabasco brand habanero sauce.

Q3: jamaican choice xxx hell hot pepper sauce.

Q4: dave's insanity ghost pepper sauce.

i put waaaay too much of the Q4 sauce on. i thought the lactose in the sour cream i spackled on the quesadilla's top would dumb down Q4's heat, but i'm sniffling, warm and slightly confused as i write.

nothing really beats the rush of spicy foods, nothing.

i have been a fan of hot sauces for some time. the feeling of endorphin release is second to none.

i have to say though, that good old tabasco sauce was just right until the company made the habanero sauce. i could probably drink an entire bottle of regular tabasco sauce and not even flinch.

i wasn't even aware of the ghost pepper until i saw some food program about it. i had to try it out and feel the burn. it's nothing you want to mess with at all. and to have a bottle of dave's insanity ghost pepper sauce makes it even worse. that company is run by a bunch of diabolical lunatics hell bent on ruining taste buds, gi tracts and any wood stained furniture.
a bunch of years ago, we had a bottle of dave's insanity sauce that fell out of the fridge and spilled on our not so clean kitchen floor. the sauce cleaned up the spot to a nice shine as i wiped it up.

that stuff has ruined meals through too much abuse.

i'm glad of hot sauces. not so much of the dare, but that they add that extra spice-or way too much of it-to foods. i eat almost all of my meals with some sort of hot sauce or another. i have even put cayenne pepper on iced cream before, for a kick.

sometimes there really isn't enough of a good thing. you have to push the limits of your endurance, and trying the hottest pepper on earth (the ghost pepper) was a safe yet daring exercise i will enjoy again and again.

if anyone knows of a hotter pepper out there let me know.

image: cheekychile.com

The senses awakened, i seek results.

to start off with, i am currently sick and tired of seeing and hearing about the new video game 'CALL OF DUTY: MODERN WARFARE 3.' i don't own a console with which to play 'MW3' upon, but i feel that since i've been bombarded with every media source concerning said game, i'll feel pretty safe to say that i think i've already played it.
my co worker had a mountain dew with 'MW3' plastered all over it.

i hope that everyone who bought the game, gets stuck on a level, and ends up with shattered flat screen television parts all over their mom's basement.

i have never been a fan of logos. it takes me a LOT of confidence in something to wear it on my person. when i see a band that really gets it, i'll fly their flag. i was a huge hunter s. thompson fan, so i still covet the gonzo t-shirt i purchased.

my new favorite shirt has been the $5 black soccer shirt that reads 'brasil' in the country's flags colors.

the reason i bought it? i liked the colors.

but do i really own these things, or do they own me?

by showing off to the world that i like these things, does it make me more engaging or more interesting? when i tried a new soda or energy drink, am i suddenly more hip or current?

if any of you know me, i am not those things. i have never given a flying shit about what anyone thinks of me, let alone what i wear.

i don't try to rave or wait in line for a fucking GAME and never will. don't believe the hype.

what ever you get today that is new will be old tomorrow, so bow out of the game and find your own stuff.
besides, i'll leave the fashion sense up to terri. she is way better at it than i and pulls it off with a grace and beauty unknown by many.

so, MW3: bad.

crass commercialism: bad.

used t shirts: good.

subliminal beard messages.

i am currently in my living room with terri and elsie. terri is watching a horrible program about brides shopping for their dress. i am not really watching this crap, but listening to the background music. you could swear that when one of these brides to be doesn't find what she wants, it's like the most dramatic part of a hitchcock movie. then the music becomes sweet when the woman gets what she wants.

this happens over and over in the show while you, the viewer, subliminally hears it happen. i have seen this many times in shows before. they were mostly dramas and also very fake. to see this happening in so called 'reality' shows is really a horrible thing to do to people.

you end up on an emotional roller coaster ride without even being aware of it. the show then makes you addicted because you don't even realize this is happening until it is over.

to have this happen in a drama or a movie is fine. to interject this into 'reality.' i fell, can be damaging.

i am going to re iterate that i am happy the television has been more off than on in recent days, and this is yet another reason why.

O.k. that aside, it's novembeard. yes, novembeard. it is the time of the year to grow facial hair if you are a fella, to get ready for the cold weather. i am on my third attempt at growing a beard and i am hoping that this time around, it will come in fully. i am hoping to have one equal but not as grey as my dads. ha! we'll see.
i remember being at my local around this time last year, and i was having a coke that night instead of drinking, and my friend said' hey, where's your beer?'

i replied, 'beer?'

His voice raised, he said', 'no BEARD!' It's novembeard.'

i was puzzled, yet bemused.

there really isn't a lot more t talk about. we've been busy at work. i've been losing weight and i am just making sure that i get enough time with elsie as i can.

it has been rough to be away from her, i've already statedthtis before, but it's worth it now as she is slowly becoming more aware of her surroundings and who terri and i are. she wakes up for me when i come home and every time i come in the room, she moves her head in my direction. pretty neat.

picture: emedco.com 'for all you surveillance sign needs.'

the indoor sauna.

do i even need to explain to you why i posted this picture of a weather map?

anyone form the region i live in were clobbered by a recent early storm that left most of us in the dark.

our power fluctuated until it went off at around 9:00pm on saturday. the next time we had power was at 1:30am on wednesday. that was three and a half days of no electricity and no heat.
we managed to use our gas stove, so lots of hot tea was consumed and we had hot meals.

i ended up getting crafty by boiling pots of water with rocks in them to get the temperature up in the closed off kitchen and bedroom of our home. our poor gecko, smiegel, almost froze to death, but she got the same hot rock treatment and sunlight to re-invigorate her self.

the biggest concern was elsie.

we were afraid that she'd catch a cold as i saw the temperature dip on our thermostat every day.

she ended up in bed between the two of us and i was relieved that terri was still breastfeeding, as her stored milk went bad in the refrigerator.

i'll have to say that she was a trooper, even when she was being changed and her skin was exposed.

on monday night we actually gave in and stayed at my mom's house in the nearby city of holyoke. they had their power back on and it also gave my mom time with elsie.

we ended up taking jackson and smiegel along for the ride to my moms.

i ended up staying at our house without power on tuesday night after work, because jackson didn't was misbehaving at my mom's and couldn't stay there again.

around 1;30am on wednesday i was in the bathroom and had to do a double take when i saw the night light above our sink come to life.

so what did i take away from this experience?

i learned that we are a very adaptable species and that i am able to go right along with a sudden change.
i learned that without power i could still entertain my self with a good book. i learned that in the old days, it took forever to do something and i had to pace my moves and be a bit more calculating in my decisions. i also enjoyed how quiet everything was. there weren't any machines constantly going on and off in our home and there weren't so many devices that had lights to distract us.

outside the night sky was at a brilliance that i don't think i'll be able to see until the next black out.

i'm pretty sure that the biggest thing i learned was that there is a lot more out there than the television or the internets.

in a world that shows you how to live on t.v., it sure was nice to actually do some living, instead of watching someone else doing it for a change.

i didn't miss either at all to be honest with you.

photo: necn.com screenshot

Late night news...

it's 2:40a.m. i have been up until 4:00a.m. every night since sunday. i don't know what is causing this, but i'm glad of the extra time to do silly things like watch bad t.v. or act like i'm a writer.

o.k. a few things:

1) stupid things i overheard the whiny temps say at my job-

'i always watch the weather channel. you folks in massachusetts got like 7 feet of snow last year...that never happens in connecticut...'

'you look like a karaoke type of guy, because of your deep, sexy voice...NO HOMO...'-this was to a co-worker. i am still grappling with the 'no homo' comment, like that was even needed in the context.

'jeremy, how do you know that pallet pattern's going to work? (after i check the pattern out on a computer.)-i swear, with these guys it's like every day is their first day.

'when's our next day off?'-this guy asked this on a tuesday...he also called in on memorial day, and got fired for using too many call ins.

all right, i'm done venting.

2) my daughter...gosh, where do i start. she has been such a good baby so far, i'm wondering when the so called hectic part will come. just two days ago she took my finger into her little hand and put it in her mouth. and she's only six weeks old. nightly i'll come home to elsie and terri in bed. terri will just get done feeding so i'll clean out her nostrils, give her some drops of vitamins and change her. i will then put elsie on my belly to bond with her. it's been really great having her so close to me.

it's been a little hard having to spend so little time with her and terri. i have a bunch of pictures on my computer at work. i constantly think about what she is going to look like when she gets older, the kinds of things i want to show her and not show her, the kind of girl and woman i would love to see her as.
i'm pretty psyched too, that i became a dad in my later thirties. i think if i was in my early twenties, my temperance would not be there as much. maybe i answered my own question about how easy things have been? we shall see.

3) i am looking forward to this weekend, because november is going to be hell month with lots of overtime. i would like to hang out with the family and have nice dinners. i really want a nice steak. and i want to rent a bunch of dollar movies and hang out on the couch all day. that would be nice. and to have some more of the guatemalan coffee i had, from the local cafe on wednesday, as a treat before work.

4) recent media adventures: tonight i watched 'captain america: the first avenger' on the blue rays. it was a well done action movie.

other movies lately: hobo with a shotgun, human centipede, texas chainsaw massacre two, holy mountain, das boot.

we have been actively watching of: the walking dead, mr.show, nova, dexter, up all night, parks & recreation, homeland, the late late show on the televisions and dvds.

and that's the late night news.

Some corrections to consider.

it came to my attention the other day that i need to correct some things i wrote about. i am no backing down on what i said at the time, as the writings were a knee jerk reaction, but i need to correct my viewpoint on these matters:

1) on august 4th, i wrote a blog called 'dear hollywood...'lambasting the need to remake films from mostly the 70's and 80's. among the films and pictured was a supposed remake of 'the thing.'

i came to find out that the re-make wasn't a re-make at all, but the story of the scandanavian team that finds the alien BEFORE the team in the '82 re-make do.

the new 'the thing' is a prequal. i will be seeing it. or a t least renting it.

2) on february 25th of this year i wrote a blog called 'emasculation pt.1' that was aimed at my rental car-a yelllow vw beetle. i am not a huge fan of vw's as the are notoriously high maintenance vehicles. BUT, the new beetle is very tantalizing as is the new vw bus. so i am taking back what i said. plus, i saw so many yellow vw beetles on the road after i rented one, i thought i was being stalked.

3) on october 6th, i wrote a blog called 'more occupy wall street sites' and have been blurbing in other posts about not being part of some 99% thing or what have you. i came to this conclusion: everyone has the right to peacefully protest in this country. everyone has the right to mass together and question what they don't like. the best part that is coming out of the 'occupy movement' is that people are communicating more and maybe SOME good could come of this. i just choose not to be a part of it. that's my right.

still, the fake sites i made up were pretty funny.

anyway, these things were on my mind, on this somewhat sunny Thursday.

When change looks and tastes good.

i'm pretty impressed with the leaps and bounds this page took over the past 24 hours.

i also tried a few new things lately, that are somewhat good, and others that are just down right nasty.

to the left we have a pile of old baby shoes. no they are locust pods, no they are one of the most disgusting things i've ever eaten: the fava bean. i didn't take this picture of the bean.

i took it from another blog where the author states

that he, too, stole the picture. so what.

fava beans are TERRIBLE. they taste like way too many beans at once. they have a smokey tinge of burned milk and a texture of biting into a beetle's abdomen. avoid the fava bean at all costs.

next up on our list is vanilla coke zero. i have been a huge fan of the pepsi max lately but alas, it wasn't on sale. i opted for the coke. it's ok. the vanilla flavor is smooth and takes the fake sugar flavor away a bit, but i'm not getting a daily dose of sugar in one can. i'm only slowly embalming my self one can of soda at a time.

and i think i'm already opting out of next year's presidential election (again.) the amount of sheer bullshit that has been spewing out of these idiots mouths is enough to turn anyone into a rabid raccoon.

the electoral process is a joke, and in this state we always favor a democrat.

i will be around to vote on november 8th of this year to re-elect our mayor for one last term.

at least locally, one vote is still one vote.

remember: politics are for people who have nothing better to do with their lives.

In full re(view) of everything around me.

i just got back from the supermarket after spending $2.50 on canned tuna and dutch coca cookies. i have holes in my pockets from lack of funds, mainly due to the fact that i was out a week's pay and am paying retro-active insurance for elsie. it was pretty neat seeing her SSN come in the mail and today she had her own insurance card. well worth the double on insurance that i am now paying.

there will be some changes to this site in days to come.

i am only going to type in lower case UNLESS I'M TRYING TO DRIVE A POINT HOME, LOUDLY.

this is due to the fact that the words move quicker from brain to page for me.

don't worry, my scholarly readers, i will still butcher the english language with run on sentences and, misplaced, commas,,,,,,,.

i tried to get a blog together on wordpress but feel more at home on the bloggers.

i also tried to delete my profile on the wordpress a few minutes to go, but couldn't navigate to the right place.

i think i'll delete pertinent information until it goes away.

WITH THAT:

i will be posting blogs about elsie, and my family as well as the usual cynically sarcastic banter.

prewarcondition is about me expressing my self and dammit, if you don't see eye to eye with what i am writing, too bad.

this past weekend was a whirlwind of fun and a bit of a scare.

it seems our youngest cat, ruby, had a bit of a fright on our bed and jumped on elsie's face, leaving three scratch marks along her right cheek.

the deepest one was about a quarter inch from her left eye SO we are grateful nothing permanent happened.

i forgive ruby for her mistake.

elsie took it like a trooper and the cuts are diminishing as i speak.

MEDIA NEWS:

i have been on an intense and almost obsessive Faith No More/Mr. Bungle phase as of late. i found some choice live downloads and have been mostly listening to Faith No More's classic 'King For A Day...Fool For A Lifetime. i am in prep for their playing of the album all the way through in Santiago, Chile on November 8th. of course i won't be there but am anxious to see if it will be streamed live or on the youtubes.
this will be the first time the guitarist who played on it-multi instrumentalist Trey Spruance will have played the album live- as back in 1995, he backed out of going on tour, to support the album.

I also happened to use an Amazon.com birthday gift card to by 'Mr. Show-the complete series.'

I used to own seasons 1&2. Now i have the whole shebang. i can't even get into how funny and offbeat the skits are on these dvds. if you know what i'm talking about then you know what i'm talking about.

Other music i've been listening to: scorn, blank stare, kondor, fantomas, brazilian lounge music, portishead.

i am also very hungry ALL OF THE TIME.

bring us some food.

The velvet rope.

Three weeks tomorrow. Yes. Three weeks. That is how long Elsie has been upon this mortal coil. These past three weeks have been a cavalcade of fun, emotion and feeling very, very tired. My alcohol consumption-which at one point was legendary-has been replaced with an ever growing need for caffeine and ginseng.

I regretted going back to work last week, as i am missing out on lots of quality time. It is important that i work though, because i am the sole insure of our dear girl.

Last week was also when both Terri and i found out just how 'easy' being parents is , so far. That was until we went to the mall.

You cannot use strollers on the escalators. which means finding a department store or using the really dirty and hot one that lords over the food court.

We had periodic feedings and one changing. That meant going to babies 'r us to use the mommy room.

The mommy room: an oasis of calm in an consumer storm.

There are two love seats, a changing table and the sign on the outside of the door to the room says 'knock before entering.'

Forget about heading to the arcade, forget about going to the video game store or the media store, we were on an covert mission.

I ended up eating a whole box of Dots as we made our way back across the mall, from getting lawn bags at The Christmas Tree Shops.

Today i am making my way to TD Bank to close my account. They sent me a letter stating that if i don't keep $100 in my account every month, they will charge me a $15 maintenance fee. I transfer just enough to cover my car payments with $4 left over each month. I already found the last two payment slips for my payments SO it look like i'll have to wait in line one last time to save $15.

It's going to be great to have an extra $180 in my pocket every month.

Other: i am not the 'other 99%' of any of this garbage that is going on. I don't belong to any of this false idealism. If i could find a way tomorrow to become really rich, and make my families life better, then that's my right. A lot of these people protesting don't realize that they are trying to interject democratic ideals into a capitalist system.

O.k.

More occupy Wall Street sites!

www. occupy-my-need-to-look-cool-in-black.org

www.this-is-our-sixties-style-revolution.org

www.i'm-way-too-much-into-the-movie-v-for-vendetta.org

www.i-don't-want-to-work-but-want-money-now!.org

www.whiney-trustafarian.org.

www.anarchydude!.org

www.occupy-space-without-having-your-facts-together.org

www.it-looked-cool-so-now-i'm-doing-it-too.org

www.occupy-the-toilet-at-the-local-starbucks.org

www.next-week-i'll-go-back-to-my-lousy-barista-job.org

www.i'm-costing-taxpayers-money-by-getting-arrested-for-my-righteousness.org

www.like-stuff's-all-bad-and-like-money-and-rich-dudes-and-stuff-you-know.org

I've been on both sides of the coin on this one. But at least it tried to gather knowledge before i stepped on my words.

This whole thing looks like a bad Rage Against The Machine video.

Here's to finding constructive use of one's time!

VIVA LA REVOLUCION!

Proudest moments.

Sorry for the sloppy lay out of this post, but you get the picture...or pictures.

These are pictures of my mom and dad with Elsie. I cannot tell you how it made me feel to see both of my parents not only holding my daughter but their grandchild. It was an overwhelming feeling of joy and elation as well as pride.

I feel that i am the luckiest son on the planet, and was overjoyed to have both my mom and dad in my home as well as my step father Peter, who was at my place when my mom got to hold Elsie for the first time, and the wonderful gifts that my step mother, Barbara helped find for Elsie.

The warmth that has melted my heart is a gift the little Elsie gave to me the moment i first heard her cry to when i look over and see her string here and there.

It was rough to go back to work tonight BUT, every penny i earn goes to the family, even if today, i turned 38.

We had a small celebration last night. Jackson is in Whately for the next week on vacation as Terri is flying solo with Elsie as i work.

As we ate and talked about time and age, i mentioned that i finally feel as though i can call my self a man. Which is a pretty intense thing to admit to.

but i'm ready to be a dad, a man and i could have only done it with the wisdom that my parents have bestowed upon me in their conventional and unconventional ways.

The new way.

We have had many changes here at he 10 Clark. Most notably, the arrival of our daughter. i have gone through similar changes that happened through our new arrival, and the new perspective that came with her.

I used to be a king slacker. I used to go to sleep late and wake late, letting things slide in order to sate my need for comfort. what the heck? nothing was going on, so a little down time is n't bad, is it?

I found out really quickly that having had my guard down for so many years took it's toll on me.

I am up for the task of taking care of our daughter and of Terri as she heals from her Cesarean. I don't mind at all that i have to take care of everything while she tends to Elsie. It's a labor of love.

The thing is: it's only been two days since we came back.

I talk big now, but what's next or what will come down the road?

Honestly, i don't know.

And i don't care. I can only take care of what's happening right now. not what i can't predict or see.

Terri and i were discussing it yesterday between diaper changes and feedings and it comes down to the fact that we want to stay on top of things from the get go. Not that if we slip a little things will fall apart, but that it's easier to get air with your head above water than to constantly gulp.

I look over at my family and want to be on point as much as possible, so i can give the most that i can.

Example: the past two days Terri woke me around eight in the morning the past two days to tell me she was hungry. i immediately shot up out of bed to provide food for her and ultimately for Elsie.

Helping without question was not one of my strong points when i was living my life before we became a family. It felt like doing a job and not for or out of love instead.

When love becomes a job, it's not a job at all. You have to work at it and keep going without question.

Please welcome Elsie Maureen Fowler

24 hours of labor.

Worth every minute.

Elsie and Terri are the world to me now.

I can't wait to share the best of my self with them.

Here are more photos:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/23632423@N02/sets/72157626907989512/

My special thanks go to Charlene, who is the best maternity nurse in the business.

Again with the waiting!

Again with the waiting. Terri went to the OBGYN yesterday and so far no new news except for the fact that her pelvis is softening. We are going to the OBGYN tomorrow for an ultrasound. We will hopefully have an updated picture of Elsie as the last one that was posted, is from April 20th.

I'm sure that Terri already posted this info on the Facebooks, so this information may be out of date.

This got me wondering though; the documentation of Elsie from conception has been going on for over nine months. My parents didn't have this ability back in the 70's (gasp) when i was born, so documenting Elsie's whole life is as easy to upload and write about.

I am not much of a technofile, so this process of documenting a whole life is going to be a great thing to share with everyone. It will also be a cool thing to show to Elsie when she's old enough to understand what she's seeing and reading.

Think about this too: i can show Elsie a picture of when she was nothing more than a zygoat, through her development on to birth and through the early years. This will be a joy to share with everyone and especially with her.

I managed to squeeze out an hour of social time last night too. I went to a place in Easthampton called The Cellar Bar to see some friends after work. I had a coke and laughed for a few minutes. My friend Rob had his laptop hooked up to the sound system, so he played some songs.

It was equally nice to get kudos from my friends and to be around them again, as i missed out on Eganstock and Matt's girlfriend's birthday the past weekends.

It's worth every minute of waiting. I just wished that i took more time off of work as it has added a bit more stress to my situation.

O.k.

Elsie is already stubborn.

Hello again, the feeling of just before going on stage is now so ingrained in my DNA, i think i'm going to rupture a heart valve.

And we continue to wait for the little spud.

If you missed it, the due date was on the 16th of this month. today's date is the 18th.

And we continue to wait.

The days have become a blur. At work, i jump to my feet, every time i think i hear my phone ringing.

The house is in order. The bags have been packed. Elsie is still hanging out in the womb. Terri is getting on really well. She has handled this thing greatly. It makes me a little weary because if it was this easy, she may want another!

Wait, my favorite commercial is on...it's for a phone from AT&T where these forklifts in a warehouse are driving themselves...give me a break.

Anyway, i just wanted to check in. Terri has her weekly appointment tomorrow and we'll find out where the birth is heading.

I'm pretty sure that we have two weeks after the due date and then we HAVE to have the baby or else she'll be too big to come out.

Today i'm feeling pretty lucky and happy. I found some Mexican coca cola-it's made with sugar-that tastes pretty good. I also bought some cherries so i'm having cherry cokes.

The mystery of the day is who Elsie gets her stubbornness from...I know i'm stubborn as all hell but Terri can lay it on pretty thick her self!

HA!

Four more days?

Hello everyone,

The due date for our little miracle is September 16th. That date is four days from today. Now, it looked good on paper, BUT , in reality, Terri and i are pretty sure that it will be a later date than that. we have all of out "i's" dotted and out "t's" crossed. We have gotten pretty good advice from our friends that have birthed, and there is a huge reference book sitting underneath this computer.

I'm glad that i've kept up with my reading because i'm sure this one will be dog eared to death.

So

we

wait.

And wait.

My stomach is in knots thinking of it as i write. So many questions with so few answers. i'm staring into the void and it's looking back at me saying 'what do you want. i have nothing for you.'

So the void is not good at giving parenting advice. I'm sure it's not good at giving any advice. It's a void.

The best part of today so far has been walking Jackson.

The worst part has been coming home to the coffee i brewed while on said walk, and having no milk because it expired on the 6th.

I don't mind black coffee, as it is a flavor deluge. I just don't like the impact on my already nervous stomach.

I have been trying to pin down this feeling that i've had since around the 5th of this month. It's a combination of fear, awe, uncertainty and nervousness.

The way i described it to a friend was the feeling i've had just before i went on stage to act or perform in a band.

The thing is, that feeling usually ebbs about a few lines into the play, or a song or two in.

This feeling starts when i wake up and doesn't end until i go to sleep. I sleep with one eye open, waiting for the moment.

I've been camping out on the couch as Terri has been tossing and turning as well as having to use the bathroom a lot more every night.

I have been trying to keep the place extra clean, and have been trying not to be a bother or a burden.

Tensions have been a bit elevated here. Not in some negative way or some damaging way but in a 'let's get this thing over with' way.

SO, LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH!

WE'RE READY TO START OUR NEW LIVES AS PARENTS!

Jackson is teaching me about leadership and motivation.

We made our way along The Motherland's side streets today, Jackson on point and myself in tow.

We had to stop every few feet so that he could catch a scent of something old or new...a trail to follow.

We would come to a cross walk and he would automatically sit. I would then give him an automatic treat as he has been very good so far today.

We round the corner and lurking inside a nearby house is a dog barking. He patiently goes by with a sideways glance to where the sound is coming from. I easily glide him away with the leash. The leash is the tether from me to Jackson, that is also the tether to myself and our home.

I have been religiously walking Jackson almost every day. it gives us a chance to bond, to get some exercise and to help me wake up.
No more mornings of staring at the bedroom ceiling, wondering why and who i am anymore.
I have a duty to make sure we both go for a walk.

I have found, as the title of this piece divulges, that these walks have not only helped us both physically, but they have helped me to chin up and gain more confidence.

I have more energy and i feel better for it mentally as well.

I think it might have to do with waking up and diving right into something.

i think it might have to do with having to focus as soon as i awaken.

Anyway, i really like it.

I didn't know which way things would go, with taking these walks, when i first started. I didn't think that i'd enjoy it at all.

Over a month into it, i came to the above conclusions and that's motivation enough to continue.

So thanks Jackson.

Thanks again.

Twelve long years.

Just for the record, i DID NOT drive a bomb loaded crappy forklift off of a dock.

Last week was the anniversary of the twelfth year that i have spent, under my current company's employ.

The day went by with me forgetting this fact, and it's the way i wanted it.

BUT i must digress.

I have done as much growing as the company i work for has. I have rebelled against everything they shoved my way, grew to appreciate the fact that i have a job, where i work in a great building and with a great crew of people.

I started the job in the middle part of 1999 after a bitter break up in Boston. My idea was to come back to the valley and spend a month or two off, then maybe work for one of the cafes or restaurants in Northampton. My brother was already working for the same company i'd join, so i decided that it'd be better to work for a greater wage and not wash dishes and maybe become a prep cook.

I ended up starting as a temp and proved my self worthy of full time, so in August of 1999 i was a full time stock handler.

I wasn't the best employee by any standard. I had a chip on my shoulder and thought i was too cool for everyone due to my extra curricular activities. Basically, for the first five years of employment i was always on warning for something or other and a general pain in most of my managers asses.

It wasn't until i ended up in offsite that i came into my own. Our offsite buildings are less stocked with people, so the those of us that are in offsite, are bigger links in a smaller chain.

I ended up learning a LOT more in the past five years than in the first.

I was 'promoted' in 2008 to work in a closer offsite to the main distribution center in Deerfield.

It was my self and one other worker, during second shift.

Things worked out really well, and we have a great working relationship, even when we took on other people and now have a crew of six full time employees and four temps.

I have processed huge orders going into the millions of dollars. I have loaded and unloaded hundreds of trailers and containers. I have moves hundreds of millions of dollars worth of product and have been in charge of millions of dollars worth of merchandise with little or no supervision, sometimes.

Pretty cool huh?

Looking back over the past twelve years brings back many great moments: Meeting friends and hanging out after work, the stock handler parties we'd put on, going out en masse to Amherst or Northampton, joking around with everyone (which still happens on a daily basis), the cookouts my manager has every once in a while,working in the lab, making new product, the long hours that ended up sustaining my crazy life outside of the job, and the work that we put in every day to help the brand be it's best.

There are two types of workers anywhere: the one's that are there for the love of the product, and those that are there for money. I am of the latter but sometimes i like to hear from people that the like our product. I like to see them talk about their favorite fragrance, or when will we get a certain fragrance back?

Shit, the place is getting to me...

...i think i'll stay here for a while longer, maybe try to become a supervisor some day and then spend the last couple of years working on a machine or something. I don't know.

I couldn't predict the future back in 1999 when my rent was handed to me by my girlfriend of three years and i was told to go, but I've learned a LOT since then and have become very wise to almost anything that has been thrown my way.

Anyway, thanks for reading this and i hope you are doing fine.

**************BABY NEWS!********************BABY NEWS!*************************

Elsie had the hiccups in the womb last night. Terri tells me it felt very weird.

Everything is on track with Elise. She is doing well and Terri is handling everything with her enduring grace.

We went through everything from the baby shower and WOW, i can't say enough about how nice it was and how cool everyone was. Thanks again!

We were able to buy a new stroller for Elsie. It's super cool and super safe. I can't wait to rock the block with it while i am walking Jackson.

Elsie's nursery is coming together quite nicely. We used two coats of primer, two coats of paint and i had to scrape the ceiling. It is a nice, subtle lavender for Eslie to enjoy. Terri's dad helped put in the cieling light, Terri's uncle Ray put the rug in and then the following week, Walter, Terri's step father, put the crib together.
On Saturday, Pad and I put the baby's dresser together....by the way: screw you IKEA!

We only have a month to go until E-Day.

As usual: stay tuned.

FINALLY...

http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-west-memphis-3-20110820,0,5874148.story

Like an old stove...

Ladies and gentlemen, i bring you the old stove that was in our kitchen.
We were so lucky to know that this relic was included with the house...and promptly made it's way out.

But look at it, really look at it.
The thing is a piece of sublime art.
It has literally no space to cook in, worn or lost dials four burners and what looks like a prep area? A prep area for the foil Swanson meals that were around when this thing was made?
I think it was from the sixties or early seventies. Now it's a car door or a piece of re-bar.

I kind of liked it the way i like classic cars: really nice to look at but could be dangerous, expensive to fix, and would waste a lot of gas to use.

So we opted for a brand new fridge and gas oven.

The new oven has been a real dream, except cleaning. It has these two iron grates over the burners, and the inside is really hard to clean after a spill.

BUT i cooked my first turkey for thanksgiving, charred green peppers on the burner and made all manner of vegetable and meat with the stove.
I have baked, broiled, basted and braised.
I have seared, steamed and sauteed.

Stoves are just as important as your fridge.
They are also more integral than a fridge because you create with an oven. You sustain life, you are the master of its quirks.

Each oven is the same off the assembly line, yet becomes your own as you wear one in.

I have been the guest of many ovens in my day but have never owned one brand new, so i can consider myself lucky that Terri not only bought the set, but let me pick out the oven as i am the 'chef' of the house.

Things will be shifting soon enough with the baby on the way. We will become better friends with our food processor and blender. I already found some great yam and pea recipes to feed Elsie.

I will round this out by saying thank you to the old stove as it brought much amusement to the inspector, his protege, and the rest of us on inspection day.

Have a great Friday!

Things are not what they seem.

Yes, my friends. The picture to the left is a motorcycle and/or car trailer that says 'EL NAZI' on it.

This picture was taken last year, when i went to Willimantic, Connecticut, to see a reunion show for and old club called Studio 158.

The club that Jon, Lyndsey and i went to is called 'The Wrench in the Works Collective.'

It's in an old, old factory and 'EL NAZI' belonged to the Spanish guys chop shop that was attached to the building.

'The Wrench' is a cozy room. It's an open space with some tables, a place for the bands to play and a sofa. And then there are the books.

Thousands of books on philosophy, feminist theory, revolts, struggles anything and everything to do with leftist thinking.

when we walked in after paying our $5, the proprietor told us we could 'peruse the literature.'

Listen, i came all the way from The Motherland (Easthampton) to see my friends band play and to see some people from back in the day. I didn't come in to read someone's graduate thesis on why the Cuban missile Crisis was good for communism, or why i have a penis and should feel guilty.

BUT, they were really nice at the place and i liked the old architecture as well as the ivy plant that was making it's way through the window crack and along the interior wall of the space.

The weird thing too: everyone was drinking beer. Cheap beer. I saw many a Bud Light Lime float around as i was having a coffee.

I guess the revolution can wait when you are 'grabbing some buds.'

I may seem harsh but i wasn't too happy to have gone this far to end up in a supposedly culturally froward place while the whole neighborhood around the club was a slum.

Why not get out of your clean, well lit place and make a real difference, instead of singing about it and going back to your McJob?

So it went from 'EL NAZI' to this.

'ElL NAZI' was the talk of all of us. I had to snap a picture.

I didn't get very far into much else this time.

Don't get me wrong: i believe in this cause but sometimes not the execution of it in this manner.

Dear Hollywood...

...please stop rehashing movies from my youth. I am sick of you raping my memories of what inspired me.

I realize that this is a trivial subject, but to those who don't know the 'classics' the way they should be seen, have no business seeing them in the first place.

John Carpenter's The Thing from 1982, was a remake. The original was 'The Thing Form Another World' that came out in 1951. Which, in my opinion, was hokey at best.
It was a 50's sci-fi matinee movie. NOT the mind blowing bloodbath that John Carpenter graced us with in the early 80's.

The film is so overtly gory, so brazen in it's one up-ing of how messed up and clever the alien is, it can't be duplicated.

The sheer element of desperation that was continually played out over and over sucks you in and never lets go.

So why re-make it? Why not just release the 1982 film and let the people see the best?

I really don't know. I did hear that it's easy to remake films such as Conan The Barbarian, Fright Night, Clash Of The Titans, Red Dawn, The Karate Kid, They Live, Total Recall, Romancing The Stone, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday The Thirteenth, Arthur, The Mechanic, Conquest of The Planet of the Apes...do i really need to go on?

So what is it that brings these movies back in a most poor fashion?

1) The studio already owns the rights. They have these films on file and just sprinkle some new 'magic' on an old story.

2) CGI. It's supposed to add something to a movie. Sometimes it does. Other times it just overtakes an already thin plot line.

3) There are no good writers left. This is not at all true. But look at reason #1. Why pay someone for a story when you can re hash an already done thing.

Most of the movies from the 80's and 90's are from an era when the blockbuster was still a real blockbuster. All the studios are trying to do is re live the golden years and make a quick buck. The integrity that was put into making 1982's The Thing, where they actually shot on an research site in the middle of a blizzard, can be reproduced digitally. It took harder work to get get the results they used to get, but Hollywood doesn't want to do it in some cases. It just wants to fill seats.

The sad thing is, they had to pick the time period where i was seeing the real thing, no matter how hokey the films could be.

I shrugged when they started to remake t.v. shows into movies like Transformers and G.I. Joe.

I felt like my memories and innocence were being sucked out of myself and anyone else that had the toys and watched the shows.

I have relented, as the movies were FAR inferior to even those dated cartoons.

I'm not boycotting the whole remake idea. I really like the remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre from 2003. That says a lot for me as the original Toby Hooper classic from 1974 is the greatest horror movie i have ever laid eyes on.

I know you won't be able to stop this from happening, these re makes, but i am always going to go back to these older, better movies no matter what.

They mean a lot to me and even if i know every frame of film, i'll be glad to pop in The Thing on a cold winter's day and revel in the fact that it's been with me in one form or another for the past 25 years.

By the way Hollywood: if you ever mess with Blade Runner, we will have some very serious issues.

Thanks for following me on this not-so-serious bit of news.

Sources:

http://www.imdb.com

http://www.denofgeek.com/movies/261202/46_movie_remakes_and_reboots_currently_in_the_works.html

For every action: a reaction.

I resign my self to be a pretty rational person. i step up when i have to and enjoy my down time just as many of you do, too. I sometimes make art and i sometimes don't. Three years ago, i wrote and created over five hundred puns, designed thirteen 'monster' pictures, and over twenty paintings using a simple paint program. I was also actively making music and enjoying culture. Now, not so much. I created the image you see here using an updated paint program that came with Windows Seven. The program is cool as you can see the black brush strokes look like paint strokes. The effect may or may not change the way i create any of these quickie one off works, but it will look a lot better than the old program that came with Windows Ninety-eight.

Now i guess i'm in the business of creating life.

Not a bad trade off, i think.
But what is really art?
A creation of expression?
A wandering into someone's soul?
A product that is a bigger commodity once one's dead?

My idea of art is just pure expression. I am obviously not trained in the arts. I just express my self. I feel art should come naturally. I can't be forced by academia. You can't take a mail in course, draw a pirate, and then you are an artist.

It doesn't work like that.

I think that's why i can't stand the idea of Andy Warhol even being considered and artist. He may have studied hype, but not art. I think he went with the next lower tier of art as commodity and not as self expression.

I mean it worked, but some poor souls had him as a bench mark and were passed over by his supposed brilliance.

Anyway, as unsubstantiated as the above remarks may seem, you can't really put a price on art or expression. When you do that, you may make money but you cheapen the concept.

Take the above piece.
Is it art?
What would you buy it for?
I didn't sign it.
You could save it to your own computer, call it yours and make millions.
Probably not, but guess what?
I really don't care.

I am listening to music that i downloaded for free. I didn't mooch it, the artist had all of his albums up for free and offered his art for all to hear. Some of it is good, really good Electronica. Others miss the mark. I love to listen to it when i'm writing as it inspires me.

Do you think the artist has accomplished what he set out to do?

It took him about four years to make the three albums. And he offered them up on a silver platter for all to hear.

My thanks to him are the words i am writing and the same ones you are reading.

The way he produced the sounds really motive me to write, create.

Will he ever read this?
Will our paths cross?
Probably not.
You never know in this day and age what can happen.
Especially in cyberspace.

I guess i can wrap this up by saying that true art is not a commodity, it is self expression that is supposed to inspire you to continue writing, making art or music or what ever and to pass that along by well...expressing your self.

True artists never 'make it.' I think they have to keep pushing limits to reach enlightenment.

Anyway, here's the link to Kondor. He was in a band in Australia before he ended up in merry old England.

I like it. Maybe you will too.

http://kondor.bandcamp.com/

Smiegel: a gecko and so much more.

Look out it's a beast! A leviathan from a desert nuclear testing site!

Just kidding. it's our Eublepharis macularius

duh.

Also known as a Leopard Gecko.

I didn't name her. It's a cliche, i know but she is a sign of the times.

I met Smiegel when i started dating Terri, over six years ago.

She is a gecko. Not much going on except a lot of sleeping and eating. We feed her once a week. A feast of crickets fit for a queen.

I found out a bit back that this is one of the heartier of the species as they live a very long life. i'm happy too because she can actually be affectionate in her own right. if you get her out of the cage, she loves to have the bottom of her chin rubbed. We haven't taken her out for a bit because of Jackson. She would be a nice snack.

Some favorite memories of being with her are: catching crickets in the back yard of our old place and seeing her eat them. The day she molted and had a translucent gecko hanging off of her.

The day we gave her her newer and bigger cage and how she ran around excited about all of the space she now had.

I figured that i'd give her the due that she deserved, because she is a silent partner in our family.

I know she's just a lizard and doesn't do much, but we have had her for a long time and she will be a great learning tool for Elsie.

So here you are, Smiegel. You are starring in your own blog post.

Cheers.

Ruby: the young and the restless.

As ramshackle as this picture is, it was taken on the days after we moved to the 10 Clark. As you can see, Ruby is helping us unpack.

Ruby. The fighter, the kneader, the little booger bean.

Ruby was born at our last residence. Our landlords cat had a litter of kittens and she was a shy, gray puffball. She seemed to be a very reserved and extremely shy kitten. Little did we know that Ruby was just biding her time to unleash her inner demon.

She is a super affectionate kittie. This past year she became a little woman. I attached my self to her after losing Pepe and she became my other little girl. She doesn't take any of Jackson's nonsense either. As much as Lily shuns Jackson, Ruby will give him a swat on the nose when he's being pushy.

The reason i love her so much is her attitude. When she wants something she will go ahead and grab it. Her love of plastic knows no end.

She is very outgoing and willing to try new things. I love the fact that she came out of her shell and became a little woman.

I could go without her claws digging into my stomach when she wants affection but look at her; she's a dreamboat!

So here's to you, Ruby. For helping me heal from loss and for being such a spunky and endearing pet.

Lily: the beautiful flower.

Continuing on our tour of pets, i had to mention Lily.

I'll get to Ruby and Smiegel later. This one is for her.

Terri owns Lily. I mean this maybe in the opposite because the lines are blurred. Lily is the undisputed queen of the house. She is a very affectionate and very beautiful cat. Terri has had her since she was born back in 2003.

Lily can be a bit of a diva. which is fine because she earns every bit of her pomp and circumstance by being very affectionate. She will wake me in the morning by sitting on my chest, giving me the eyes that you see in the picture to the left.

She fell in love with my late cat Senor Pepe and i have the pictures to prove it.

She is a gentle cat who likes to play, but no rough stuff.

Lily likes to be pampered, which is fine with me because she is a beautiful little lady.

Lily has a bunch of sisters and brothers somewhere. But she is unique and great in her own right.

Terri told me that she went missing from home and became pregnant. unfortunately, she lost the whole litter. This was some time before Lily and i met, so i'm sure i'd be distraught.

We love her so much. She does this cute thing called 'the bear' when we give her treats. She'll get on he hind legs and grab for the treat like a dancing bear.

I am so happy that with my lovely mom to be,Terri, i also happened upon such a beautiful creature.

She is especially funny when we put her witch costume on. She hates it so much, the look on her face is priceless.

So, that is Lily. She is a one of a kind sweetheart and i think the above picture really says it all.

Thanks for letting me share her with you.

Jackson is my new best friend.

The picture on the left is Jackson. I mentioned him about two blogs back, and many times before. he will be my partner in crime from now on. he came to us when we first moved into the 10 Clark last year. He is now a very active member of our family. I enjoy his company mostly because he has a tremendous personality and a sweet heart.

His story is this: he was part of a litter born under someones stairs. We never found out how many brothers and sisters he had, but we know that his mom is an Border Collie and his dad is a Labrador.
We know that his previous owner was really quite cruel to him in the fact that he or she kept him locked in a dog crate for the first five months of his life. This stunted his socialization skills. The person finally gave him up to a no kill shelter just outside of Salem. He ended up at a training camp for police dogs. From what i remember, the guy trained mostly German Shepard's, but took on Jackson to get him up to speed.

That is when Terri found him on a web site and now he's ours forever.

Admittedly, i was not too enthused by this situation as our cats Lily and Ruby were just used to their new surroundings and to this day, Jackson and Lily are mortal enemies.

He also had problems with acting out. He would get crazy and i have many scars on my arms to prove it. It was a difficult few months but he soon melted my heart.

I mean, look at that picture and tell me you couldn't love this guy!?

We ended up putting him on a very low dose of Prozac, and he is the better for it, as he isn't as anxious as he used to be.

So he still goes to classes every week and is a very very good boy compared to when he first arrived.

What does he mean to me? He's my friend and comrade. He helped me to be more gentle and my reward is his undying loyalty.

I didn't think i was a dog person at all. I'm still not. I'm a Jackson person.

I just wanted to document his story in case you were wondering about him.

Plus the picture is pretty cool too.

No title.

I have been so busy chatting you up about everything, that i haven't really mentioned the baby in a bit. Here and there, but not really focusing any really time on her. Why? I don't know.

She's doing fine. Terri's last visit to the doctor checked out well. Terri has to go every two weeks now. I feel assured by this fact because it's the third trimester and Elsie has to finish 'cooking' so she'll come out fine.

According to Your Pregnancy Week By Week by Glade B. Curtis & Judith Schuler, We are in our 33 week, the baby weighs over four pounds and is about a foot long.

Thank you, doctors.

We still have to finish the baby's room, which will be out of the way ahead of schedule. Terri's mom's dentist donated a full crib/dresser and changing table for the unbelievable price of: nothing.

We have tons of clothes already, the breast pump, the this, the that. That little room is going to fill up very quickly.

The baby shower is coming up.
I hope that everyone who received an invitation will attend. It's going to be a celebration of what's to come, an homage to my Grandmother Elsie and a cackling cauldron of womanhood. Ha!

My job? I will be here at the 10 Clark with all the cast off males, probably grilling meat and trying not to feel awkward about my lack of sports knowledge.

It's not really traditional for men to show up at a baby shower, especially the dad. I guess I would be a distraction from Terri and our baby.

These are modern times and i'm sure that tradition has been debunked, but it's one i'll gladly follow to ensure my sanity.

So there you have it.

Terri is fine, which means Elsie is fine. I am fine too. I am on my second juggernaut week at work. I will end today at eleven p.m. with thirty-six hours finished and fourteen more to go.

It's worth every minute of my time because it will help the three of us.

'Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.'
Bill Cosby

Picture: from the archives. Taken on 7/24 by my dad.