End of the year?

This year was a whopper.

This was easily one of the most challenging and yet rewarding years i have had in recent memory.

First off, i turned forty.  

My body decided to make me allergic to all nuts ( i was down to cashews and almonds- they are out) then there was the massive tooth infection/ extraction as well as the usual bumps and bruises, and  me trying to be an active father, that have been the real challenge.

I look forward to sleep.  I take afternoon naps.  In the past i would fly as fast and high as i could, ever reaching new heights of glory due to spontaneity and vigor, and now?

I am in more balance and in more focus than i have ever been in.

I have whittled away the parts of me that did not promote further growth for my self-and especially my family-and have been pleasantly happy with the results.

Do you want to know what the key was?

A huge part of it was listening and enjoying the music of my youth.  The music i first enjoyed outside of the main stream sounds i was accustomed to.  I am talking about the stiff i listened to BEFORE i conformed to punk and BEFORE i wore the uniform and flew the flag.

The music of later Black Flag, Skinny Puppy, old Rollins Band, The Velvet Underground.  They all gave me my initial spark and have re-invigorated my sense of interest in well, being myself.

That long summer of 1988.  The end of my innocence and the beginning of my great adventure that still continues to this day.

Ok. Happy New One.  To all three of my readers.  

Collared Greens.

Visuals 6.

    Four generations & an uncle. 

    Finger painting this morning.

    Pallets.

    Jackson at Nonotuck Park.

    50¢ binoculars and Mt. Holyoke.

   The Holyoke Merry-Go-Round. 

Sounds: Black Flag, Gang of Four, Skinny Puppy, Bottle Rocket Soundtrack, John Coltrane.

Visuals:  Pacific Rim, Star Trek: Voyager, American Horror Story, Movie 43, Wall-E, Liebstraum. 

Extraction.

ex·trac·tion
ikˈstrakSHən/:
noun
the action of taking out something, esp. using effort or force.
"mineral extraction"
synonyms: removal, taking out, drawing out, pulling out.

Almost three Fridays ago, i decided to eat a salad.  It was a good salad.  Full of nice chicken, beans, and artichoke hearts.  I took a good bite out of one artichoke heart and WHAM!  Instant pain in one of my upper right teeth.

It hurt like hell, but quickly subsided and i thought nothing of it.

Fast forward to Tuesday and this dull  throb starts to gain it's timber upon the tooth that i had bitten hard on with of all things: an artichoke heart.

The pain increased and by Wednesday afternoon i decided to go to the dentist.  I left work at 215pm and made an emergency appointment for 430pm.  I went home and lay in pain, hoping the dentist would find out if there was food or some seed or something lodged in the tooth, or in between the teeth.
The throb's crescendo increased into every heart beat, every pump of blood would send it to the tooth.  I was starting to feel the full blown agony of this ache, and my already weak will was waning.

After some prodding, banging on the tooth and finally an X-ray, my poor tooth (#5 by the charts)  had jammed up into my jaw with such force, that one of the roots was broken and the nerve was exposed.

So, it's time to extract this thing and send me home right?!

Why, no.  I think the dentist sort of whined (it was getting to be around 5pm) that they had a 'dinner meeting' that night.  My ire was growing.  I knew this was getting worse.  I told the dental assistant that i was feeling feverish.  She took my temperature and it  was normal.

I finally piped up 'excuse me, i am in agony.  Could you get this DAMNED THING out of my mouth?!'

The dentist walked out of the room and came back maybe ten minutes later and said that they couldn't do the extraction due to 'possible complications.'  I knew i was getting the brush.  i wonder what kind of nice meal they would have at their dinner meeting?  I sure wasn't going to be eating anything besides yogurt, that's for sure.

So the dentist writes out a prescription for some 'high end narcotic' and gives me the number for an oral surgeon i'm supposed to see the next day.  Ok.  at least i won't be in pain tonight.

Just wait until you read what happens next.

I get to the pharmacy.  The pharmacist takes the prescription slip, i am still in agony.  HE then calls me back over after five minutes and lets me know that he's having a problem with the dentist's federal Id.  This is a n identification number doctors and the like get to dole out their super happy fun meds.  Well her's wasn't working.  HE calls her and confirms the number.  It still doesn't work.  He tells me to try another pharmacy.  I shuffle out, in pain and getting angry.

And the same thing happens at the next pharmacy.  I inquire as to why the ID is not working.  The pharmacist says it could be anything from the dentist failing to register properly to passing fraudulent scripts.
Maybe the dentist was too busy planning a dinner meeting to care about their patient's well being.

So i head home.  After doing the only thing i could think of to dull the pain ( i was told not to take aspirin etc. as i may be put under for the extraction the next day) and bought some vodka.  

I went home, slammed two double shots and went off to lala land.

And then around 9 pm, i was drenched in sweat, delusional and in the worse pain ever.  The right side of my face had started to swell up and the pain was reaching behind my eye.  I was guzzling water (no more vodka, my body did not want that.) and sweating it out at an alarming rate.  I would have these delusional dreams that i was in Black Flag and on tour singing for them.  I mean i felt like i was right there in the thick of it.  I was G-O-N-E GONE.

Morning brought more pain and i could barely put two words together.  Terri took my tempurature: 102.9.  I was dangerously close to being hospitalized but decided to stick it out, knowing the extraction would fix everything. 

Terri called for my appointment at 215, i called into work and proceeded to moan about the house like some feverish specter.

I forced down half a bowl of oatmeal and guzzled more water.  Finally, my appointment arrived and after a grueling session of forms i was in the waiting room and it started to smell.  Like rot or something.

As a matter of fact, i can taste the smell.  I was like burned milk or hair that is on fire.  Just awful.

I made it into the exam room of the oral surgeon and i was a bare bones triage.  The oral surgeon-my new hero-  was way cooler than any dentist i've had.  He and his assistants had this sense of urgency that i can only equate to Harry Tuttle in the movie Brazil.

HE stuck one finger in my mouth and said 'we've got pus.'  and started filling my mouth with gauze.  

I said 'that's what i've been tasting?!'  and the oral surgeon snaps back with 'you should smell it!'  

My kind of humor.  I like this place.

So the tooth has to come out.  HE had this huge needle with these small vials of novocaine that he kept punching into the ever growing pus filled gap that was above my poor old #5 tooth.  The assistant informed me as the numbness set in, that the bacteria in the infection actually counter  acts the numbing agent in the novocaine.  That's why the oral surgeon had to stab me five times and use four vials of the stuff.

So, out the tooth goes and they power wash into the hole to get all of the infection out.  The assistants suction hose  kept getting gooped up with pus as she worked.  They even cut at the top of my gum line and attached a tube to 'help drain me out.'

I was already feeling a lot better.  I was down a tooth, but i finally got what i needed.

So they sent me out-$124 later- with some powerful antibiotics and some vicodin to help ease me through the next days.

Oh, and what's that?  Why yes, i do operate heavy machinery dear oral surgeon.  Oh what?  Well i agree.  I probably shouldn't go to work and rest up until Tuesday.

I took the antibiotics faithfully, and despite taking two of the pain pills right off the bat ( i owed this to my self after the previous evenings delirium) i took them as prescribed and even had the following Monday off of then vicodin completely and on to acetaminophen.

 Oh, and to my dentist: here's what you do LIKE THE ORAL SURGEON DID:  you call to make sure your patient is all right.  You follow through and take care of the people that pay you to do so.

I cancelled the Monday appointment with my dentist and received a rather rude message from the receptionist about making a follow up appointment.  As if.

So i went through pain and feverish agony all night because:

a)  They wouldn't do an extraction because of a dinner meeting.

b)  The dentists FID was not working for me to get relief.


I am taking the high road.  I have thrown at least $5000 at this dentist over the past six years only to be treated like some sort of second class citizen.

I have decided that tooth #5 was not the only thing being extracted from my life.

Long live tooth #5.  May an aspiring dentist use you well to train on.

Forty.

At 10:07 am EST i turned forty years old today.

I am currently writing in my living room, Terri and Elsie are asleep on the couch as the end credits to Where The Wild Things Are roll.

We are being lazy today.  I want to ease into the next half of my life with ease and i want to be better with the things i do.

That is my goal.  Well, that and raising my kid, being a good man to Terri, maintaining my job and trying to ease my self back into music.

I would rush into things, gobble them up, and spit them out too quickly in my past.  Endeavors that i could've really appreciated, ended up falling to they wayside.

I am not begrudging my self of anything.  Today and last night were especially dear times and i felt complete being amongst  my closest friends.

I wanted to keep this short.  Forty is a milestone.

But it's also just a number.

List #1.

Examining influential bassists.

Background:  It was1989. My brother had a Service Merchandise bought bass. I had marijuana.  He needed the marijuana and i needed the bass.  I was now a bassist.  I was terrible. I am just a little bit better now. 

Flash forward 24 years and many bands later, i want to share with you those who inspired me to keep the bridge between the high and low end together.

Early influences:

* denotes major influence.

Eric Avery. *

David J. *

Andy Rourke.

Kira Roessler. *

Simon Gallup.*

Dan Lilker.*

Andrew Weiss.*

Flea.*

Norwood 'Fish' Fisher.*

From the 90's to today:

Les Claypool.*

Geezer Butler.

Kim Gordon.

Mike Watt.*

Paul Simonon.*

Trevor Dunn.*

Graham Lewis.

Rob Wright.*

My favorite bassist?  

Probably Kira Roessler.  

She was direct and succinct, but had one hell of a time keeping up with Greg Ginn's time changes and weird 

anomalous playing in Black Flag.  Listen to their album 'In My Head' or 'Live in '84' to get a good idea of her playing. 

In fact, my favorite version of Black Flag coincides with the fact that the first punk tape i purchased in the summer of 1988 was Flag's 'In My Head.'  So repeated sessions in my basement room probably drilled that in.

Here's a pic of the Black Flag line up that i like the most:

L-R: Greg Ginn, Henry Rollins, Bill Stevenson and Kira Roessler hoisting some java between marathon practice sessions. 

So search some of the lesser known names out of you want.  Check out Nomeansno and early Wire for sure. 

And Mike Watt is HIGHLY overrated.  But The Minutemen were great. 

calm.

The shadows are getting longer as the earth starts tilting on it's axis.

Summer's ambivalent sigh has given way from brutal heat to cool evenings devoid of sweat and dehydration.

Plants have grown as i have, giving an equal yield of new and enjoyable fruits.

My longing for more coalesces into the need for calm and revision.

This is my ode to the coming fall:  revising my already abundant inventory of the things i've nurtured over the past few months. To study greatly on the seasons to come, and the wonderful challenges they offer.

I have planted seeds of calm, have nourished in the glow of family, home and friendship.  I gave regained my sense of humanity, humility and temperance. 

calm.